I must be too annoying 4 u.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
I feel like delivery guys should know that when you order lunch for one and answer the door wearing sweatpants, there's no need to say "Happy Valentine's Day."
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
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