I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
Randomize