I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize