hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
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