i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
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