unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
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