I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
Randomize
