I'm at some bar in brklyn... just made out with a guy named Owen.
He is a pre-school teacher... just sang me a song about weather.
you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
He has the fingertips of a God
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