last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
Just saw Santa sitting on a restaurant patio drinking beer and using his free hand to gesture to cars that he's watching them
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
Randomize