Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
Some chick asked if she could eat me because I'm dressed as a taco. I introduced her to RJ. Best Wingman.
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
Randomize
