i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
Randomize
