new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
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