I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
You know what's fun. When your getting a new mattress and you forget you put your vibrator under your old mattress and the moving guy finds it
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Randomize
