Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
