Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
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