so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
I could fuck to npr.
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
send nudes
from the living room?
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
Randomize
