wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
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