i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
Why is there a living, breathing cow on your front porch?
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
Randomize
