I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
You text me last night that you invented a new food. Cheese-less grilled cheese. Congrats, you made toast.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
Randomize
