she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
Never let your siblings swipe right.
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
Randomize