Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
The good news is that I can 100% reassure you that you did not get knocked up by some creepy Italian dude named Sal Manella last night.
The bad news is that you will never know the name of the guy who may have gotten you pregnant last night because he clearly gave you a fake name, sweetie.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
