Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
I wish you could order shots online.
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
Randomize
