$35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.
Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
when i say i joined a midget dating site why do u assume i was drunk
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
Found your dick twin last night
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
Maybe he injected his testicle?
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
Randomize