Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
It took me 40.8 seconds to take a dump at her house, I know because I timed myself.
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
Just used my flashlight app to find a gummy lifesaver I dropped on the floor
I like how you're utilizing your resources
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
He was all “please don’t bail because I’m missing work for this” last night
Honey no, I need dick. I’m not going to bail
Randomize
