What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
I kept yelling "BY ORDER OF THE PEAKY FUCKING BLINDERS" in a terrible brummie accent at everyone I saw wearing a flatcap.
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
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