new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
Just remembered that I got laid thanks to my glow in the dark Batman belt buckle. Need to wear it more often.
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
