There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
There are huge fuckin pieces of palm tree in the road. what a road hazard. as i sit here and text you as i swerve to miss them
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me?
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
Because everytime she talks to you she goes in her room and plays Come Sail Away on repeat. Can't take this shit anymore Jake
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
Randomize