Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
