Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
Woke up chewing my pillow from a dream where I was scarfing Cajun pasta from TGI Friday's. That's a new level of fat, even for us
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
Randomize
