Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
Our house almost burnt down last night. I woke up at 4:10am to the smoke alarm going off bc the bean bag chair was on fire so i extinguished it and smoked a bowl at 4:20 to celebrate my fire extinguishing abilities
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
Randomize
