Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
My cab driver just texted me 'goodnight beautiful'. I think my 'desperate for a guy phase' has just moved into a fuck my life phase.
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
