new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
Randomize
