Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
Maybe i shouldn't have told him the key to getting in my pants was double vodka sodas and Nelly's song "grillz."
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
Tripping over coffee tables hurts shins but face is okay bc I landed on a sofa.
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
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