and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
Randomize
