Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
I skipped work to stalk him.
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
So i woke up on a park bench... Using my shoe as a pillow, cuddling a empty handle of vodka... Yet I'm still in my living room. Someone please tell me why all my vodkas gone? I'll deal with the park bench situation at a later time.
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