I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
Panties = found
Randomize
