it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
I had a dream that chipotle was out of burritos... Was more like a nightmare.. Gotta go make sure it wasn't real now
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
Blood and glitter go together right?
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
Randomize
