What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
It's not Christmas until you get a photo from an ex wearing a Santa hat and red boxers... And then you just respond with, "nope."
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
Randomize
