Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
Randomize
