I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
jump out the window naked night went bad
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
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