so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
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