So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
Randomize
