ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
At the hospital, the nurse kept telling me that i either had appendicitis, a tubular pregnancy, or an ovarian cyst. I kept asking if i could just have chlamydia instead...
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
Dad, is it in any way illegal for me to run around throwing handfuls of lucky charms at people tomorrow?
you're kidding right?
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
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