I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
You need Xanax blowdarts
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
He stumbled in drunk at 7am, while we were getting ready for work. He poured a bowl of Cap'n Crunch, poured Jack Daniels on it., and said he was having "Captain Jack" for breakfast. I don't know how he's alive and employed. I hope the Cap'n calls in sick for him today.
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
"They let me see the x-ray. My nose is broken. I saw it. It was cool. Well, I guess it would be cooler if it wasn't my nose."
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
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