he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
Randomize