don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
Randomize