Fine. I'll sleep in my office
We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
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