this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
I just told the bartender to “give me something that will murder me”
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
Randomize
