Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
Randomize
