we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
Can't be like "hey can you elaborate on this three year old tweet" can I?
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
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